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During the 1980s and most of the 1990s, learning you were HIV-positive meant you had a year or two to live.
I'm a 32-year-old English guy, and this morning I was diagnosed as HIV-positive. I hope you have a friend you can confide in, because you need a shoulder to cry on and I can't provide that for you here. I'm just a little older than you—okay, I'm a whole lot older than you.
I came out in the summer of 1981—and two years later, healthy, young gay men started to sicken and die.
Seeking Weapons Of Male Penile Satisfaction Foreplay isn't just for vagina-havers, SWOMPS!
Penis-havers have nerve endings all over their bodies—inside 'em, too—and while many younger men don't require much in the way of foreplay, older men and/or men taking SSRIs often benefit from additional forms of stimulation both prior to intercourse and during intercourse. I know some men can't go there because that tit-play shit—like feelings, musicals, sit-ups, and voting for women—could turn you gay.
And once you're on meds, DADAC, your viral load will fall to undetectable levels and you won't be able to pass HIV on to anyone else (undetectable = uninfectious).
Arguably, your boyfriend and your other sex partners are safer now that you know than they were before you were diagnosed.
But if you're up for it, SWOMPS, have the wife play with or even clamp your tits, and then shove a plug in your ass that stimulates your prostate while also remembering to engage what's often called "the largest sex organ": your brainz. If you're already proficient at JV dirty talk—telling 'em what you're about to do ("I'm going to fuck the shit out of you"), telling 'em what you're doing ("I'm fucking the shit out of you"), telling 'em what you did ("I fucked the shit out of you")—move on to varsity dirty talk: Talk about your fantasies, awesome experiences you've had in the past, things you'd like to try or try again with your partner.
To get your dick there—to push past those SSRIs—fire on all cylinders (tits, hole, brain, mouth, and cock) before and during insertion. I'm in a long-term, mostly monogamous relationship, but my boyfriend is overseas for work at the moment, so I can't really talk to him about it. Diagnosed And Dazed And Confused I'm so sorry, DADAC.
Because it's not HIV-positive men on meds who are infecting people, it's men who aren't on meds because they don't know they're HIV-positive. The news you just received is distressing and life changing.
But it's not as distressing as it was three decades ago, and it doesn't mean your life is over. You have a lot of time left, and if you get into treatment and take your meds, DADAC, you will live a long and healthy life, a life filled with love, connection, and intimacy. Don't wait until your boyfriend returns to tell him.
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