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Guilford was one of the first academic researchers who dared to conduct a study of creativity.

He challenged research subjects to connect all nine dots using just four straight lines without lifting their pencils from the page.

Only 20 percent managed to break out of the illusory confinement and continue their lines in the white space surrounding the dots.

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A spouse might accept her husband’s blame and feel guilty for his drinking or addiction.

Victims of abuse or sexual assault frequently feel guilt and shame, despite the fact that they were victims and it’s the perpetrator that is culpable. If appropriate, talk about what happened in a 12-Step group. Realize that you can forgive yourself and still believe you were at fault, just as you might forgive someone else even though you think the person was in the wrong.

The idea went viral (via 1970s-era media and word of mouth, of course).

Overnight, it seemed that creativity gurus everywhere were teaching managers how to think outside the box.

Yet, for many, self-acceptance remains elusive because of unhealthy guilt – sometimes for decades or a lifetime. You might hold a belief that you should feel guilty and condemn yourself – not once, but over and over – or guilt may simmer in your unconscious.

Either way, this kind of guilt is insidious and self-destructive and can sabotage your goals.

Self-forgiveness following guilt is essential to esteem, which is key to enjoyment of life and relationships.

Guilt actually encourages people to have more empathy for others, to take corrective action, and to improve themselves.

Rationalizing or brushing it under the rug to avoid self-examination may help temporarily, but not achieve self-forgiveness. For example, “Adultery is okay if my spouse never finds out.” Be honest, and decide which values you agree with. Think about what may have led you to abandon your values?

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